> Sum of All Fears

Oct. 7, 2004

God is greater than the sum of all my fears. 

This is my litany whenever I feel afraid. 

And today, I woke up feeling apprehensive. 

I dreamed that I was in Baguio City for a seminar.  I saw Baguio Cathedral on our way to Session Road or downtown.  I remembered wanting to stop so I could buy my current favorite snack - Mikasan Choco Flakes. But since we were quite rushing, I thought that I would just come back later.  Back in the house (...quite weird since I was in Baguio instead of Manila), I remember that I asked my sister to hurry up so we could catch the mass at Baguio Cathedral and I proposed that we go home the following day rather than that day so we could go sightseeing.

In another dream, I was in a seminary or a convent that was as old as the churches seen in Intramuros.  I couldn't remember what I returned to a nun inside a cubicle and whose face I shouldn't see or else, something bad will happen to me.  I remember walking along its cold walls.  And I remember wishing that I had brought my camera with me.

My dreams were not particularly frightening but I can't help feeling that these were foreboding of bad things. 

This evening, my mother showed me that 6 out of the 11 carps which I bought just last Sept 18 died today for no apparent reason.  There is a belief here that when pets die, they are actually saving the owner from worse tidings.

But whatever lies ahead, there's nothing I can do but face it and pray for God's guidance in every step I take.  Fear could not conquer me because God is with me and He is greater than the sum of all my fears.